Modern Mamahood: Toddlers Play Hard on Playscapes

With my active, stimulation-needy toddler (because she's brilliant of course)...I'm always on the hunt for something that will truly captivate her for as long as possible. That's why I came to a screeching halt while driving past a yard sale one day where I saw an indoor "playscape" similar to the one pictured above.

Yes it takes up a bit of space, but it is completely worth it. We brought this into our home when my daughter Regina Jade was about 12mo old and at that point she mostly got her kicks out of simply standing on the lower pieces and the way the foam felt squishing under her feet. The individual pieces can be interlocked together (via velcro or other fasteners) for all kinds of combos.

Now that RJ is nearly 17mo, she plays with the foam fortress in different ways, which I love seeing. She's climbing up and down the wedge part and stepping on and off the rectangular blocks and enjoys sliding her stuffed animals down the wedge. The tunnel part is a ton of fun for her on its own; she flips it around from a tunnel position, to it's side to be a little secluded "chair", and upside down where she jumps and walks around in her mini half-pipe.

RJ gettin' her play on

Needless to say she expends a large amount of energy on this thing and she's honing her motor skills. And a bonus for us mamas, she'll go at it for a pretty long amount of time (we're talkin' over 20min here!). I also like the fact that the "playscape" is very similar to the one at the child center she goes to while mommy and daddy hit the gym. They bring theirs out frequently for the youngins and I'm sure it's made her feel a lot more confident taking her turn.

You can find the item featured at the top HERE, but keep your eye yard sales because finding this thing for $5 like I did is a major score.

From Amazon's product description: Constructed of dense foam covered in durable, heavy duty cloth-backed, wipe-clean vinyl.

The Modern Mamahood Column on the Ladies Lotto Blog:

As our Ladies Lotto community grows and evolves, we now have quite a few mamas and mamas-to-be! The LL Modern Mamahood weekly column presents the issues and products related to being a Ladies Lotto Mama. Blogger: Lana Perry

Modern Mamahood: The Puppy-Stage of Toddlerhood

As my wee one, Regina Jade enters toddlerhood, she's basically turned into a puppy. I'm not sure how long the puppy stage will last, but I think there should be a chapter about the puppy stage in most child-rearing educational books.

Knowing whether or not your child is like a puppy might give parents insight into how to care for and entertain their little one. I've broken down the characteristic similarities between my child and a puppy, in a very scientific way, for you to measure puppy-ness in your own tot.

Cuteness - Like a puppy, she is super cute...people squeal when they see her and would pet her if I'd let them.

Going Outside - RJ always wants to go outside. If she gets the idea herself she'll stand at the door and indicate she wants to go out. If someone mentions going outside, she gets super excited and runs to the door to be let out.

Marking Territory - While puppies mark their territory with pee, RJ marks hers in her own way. As she bops along in a new environment, she touches nearly every single thing on her path.

Scrounging for Food - Puppies are notorious for begging for food or standing around waiting until someone throws them a frickin' bone here. RJ does the exact same thing when others are eating in front of her.

Whining - RJ's whines when she doesn't know a word for something, or just doesn't feel like using a word, and it sounds a lot like a puppy's whine: "eh, eh, eh, eh?"

Sleeping Well - After nearly a year of not "sleeping like a baby" through the night, RJ finally has this one down and sleeps like a pro, much like a worn out puppy.

Playful - It's no surprise that toddlers and puppies are both playful, they want to play play play, 80% of the time.

Untrained - Like a puppy, RJ hasn't yet learned how to pee in a more socially acceptable place. She is also not capable of walking alongside her "owner" for long. Both advancements will take dedicated training.

Loves Balls and Parks - Puppies and RJ love playing with balls...fetch is one of their favorites. She also loves parks, just like puppies.

Acting Like a Puppy - One of RJ's favorite animals is the puppy, and she's learned how to take on the characteristics of a puppy by barking and panting. When she does this, its become extremely hard to tell the difference.

What should you do if you feel your child might actually be a puppy, or really close to one? Simple: give her cuddles, food, guidance, understanding and let him or her run wild as often as possible. I personally am not a fan of the child-leash, but in extreme cases of child puppydom...I have come to understand their place.

The Modern Mamahood Column on the Ladies Lotto Blog:

As our Ladies Lotto community grows and evolves, we now have quite a few mamas and mamas-to-be! The LL Modern Mamahood weekly column presents the issues and products related to being a Ladies Lotto Mama. Blogger: Lana Perry

Modern Mamahood: Stimulate

This past weekend was A3C Hip Hop Festival in Atlanta for me -- I run sponsorship for this annual event and we completely blew it out of the water this year. Really good times!

While I was there, one of the vendors I had in our merch area brought her 16-month old son along for the day. Her son was very chill and laid back and really doing absolutely nothing the entire time.

I know it's a matter of fact that males develop slower than females throughout their earlier years, and I am the last person to pass judgment, but this child seemed sadly under-stimulated. Here's a toddler who has learned to walk but is content just sitting on mommy's lap, not playing with anything, or doing anything (we talked long enough for me to know there weren't any other challenges this child was dealing with).

So this leads me to believe that like many other toddlers and babies I've witnessed, this child must be under-stimulated. Comparatively, my daughter who is the same age is such a wild little beast-baby, there's no way I'd be able to keep her contained at a vendor booth for 12-hours.

In thinking about this, I just wanted to remind parents to STIMULATE your growing, thriving children. I'm guessing that LL-mamas would naturally do this; we've got so much creativity and hunger to learn and explore within ourselves. But this is a message I took home with me and have begun improving on already.

If you need help thinking of new ways to engage your children, or if you have a friend or relative who does...start by thinking of all the ways you could help them learn about:

• Their senses: Music, new foods, textures, perfumes, books, conversation
  
• Their imagination: Make stuffed animals talk and move, make forts and tunnels out of your environment, use a banana phone
• Their world: Take them outside and let them get a feel for all the different elements of the earth and weather, let them see people of different sizes, colors and dress, take them to busy and also empty spaces
• People: Teach how to greet people and how to say good-bye, let them approach other little kids and adults under your supervision, remember they follow your lead so smiles go a long way toward a friendly child
• Motor skills: Show them how to run and roll around, give them safe places to climb and balance, let them try to do things even if they get frustrated

Point is, guide them on their journey of experiencing the world. As a new mom, I'm always intrigued by how often I have to demonstrate how to play with new toys before my daughter gets how to do it herself. Logically, we need to take the lead in so many other areas as well if we want a well-rounded, social, confident little cutie.

The Modern Mamahood Column on the Ladies Lotto Blog:

As our Ladies Lotto community grows and evolves, we now have quite a few mamas and mamas-to-be! The LL Modern Mamahood weekly column presents the issues and products related to being a Ladies Lotto Mama. Blogger: Lana Perry

Modern Mamahood: Discipline for Beginners

I've always felt that moms who are best at discipline are those who can make an impact with only a look or the tone of their voice. I can recall one booty-swat (for breaking mom's skin with nails down her back, age 2yrs), two slaps across the face (for being nonstop disrespectful age 7yrs-ish), but countless scary facial expressions and severely angry sounding instructions that were enough for me to behave.

It's so hard to think of having to use even a nasty tone with our sweet peas, but pushing limits is the way children grow and learn about how to be in society and within their family. It's our responsibility as their parent to show them these limits and also to harness a level of control that will be the foundation for getting through their crazy teenage years -- remember how many limits we pushed then?

My daughter, RJ, is now 14.5 months and has been testing her limits for awhile now; she's definitely no longer a "baby" but very much a toddler. She gets enraged with anger sometimes when she doesn't get her way and will swat and say "nah! nah!" for "no! no!", scream and be very dramatic. In order to avoid the kind of child that I see on Supernanny we've had to start disciplining.

How do you discipline before a child is ready for a time-out, or doesn't need one? Here are some tips:

1. The most effective discipline I've seen work firsthand is to tell your child not to do something. If they do it again, I say "If you do that again, I'm taking it away", and then they do it again and I take it away. Easy.
   
2. Try to save the word NO for really extreme or dangerous situations, (like throwing your cell phone in the toilet). For other instructions that don't put you, your child or an object in danger, teaching them to understand phrases like "Not in the mouth" or "That's mommy's", will work better for you all when you need to urgently get their attention with a stern, loud "NO!".
   
3. If your child has a bit of a temper like mine (must have skipped a generation!), it's important you let him or her express their anger. Tell them you understand that they are angry and it's okay to be upset. Let them vent a little, cry, scream, kick, etc, just like we need to do in our adult way.
4. Toddlers can understand so much more of what we say than what they can show us. Explain to your child that they can't or must do something, looking them directly in their eye at their level.
5. Don't go on and on trying to reason with your child; they understand you but don't go overboard. A simple sentence explanation is fine, and repeating the same thing more works too.
   
6. Once they modify their behavior, be sure to positively reinforce that right away by saying "good girl/boy", clapping, or whatever it is that you do. This is a massively important part of disciplining.
   
7. As always, distraction is the best way to move forward! Never underestimate the power of crazy faces, weird noises and ice cubes.
   

The Modern Mamahood Column on the Ladies Lotto Blog:

As our Ladies Lotto community grows and evolves, we now have quite a few mamas and mamas-to-be! The LL Modern Mamahood weekly column presents the issues and products related to being a Ladies Lotto Mama. Blogger: Lana Perry