Saturday, July 5, 2008


So, I'm home, mostly administering to my boys hangover today (he likes july 4, we had a party, it happens), and the TV is on.
There's a ad on that shows a young girl assaulted with images of commercial beauty: models and boobs and legs and all of this. The ad zooms out on her looking isolated, grey, and alone on the couch.
Then, joy of joys, the ad informs me that dove has been sponsoring programs to make young women feel more beautiful: and then, the little cutie, formerly on the couch tells me that she "vows to feel beautiful every day."
I actually don't care if i feel beautiful everyday: I care if I feel strong, interesting, intelligent, engaging, sexy, awesome, caring, daring, smart, tough, and the list goes on. Beauty, really, rarely comes into it.
My mom is the shit, and she's cute, and she has a great partnership with my father, but, perhaps partially because she grew up as the ugly duckling in a family of beauty queens, she trusts her mind and her degrees and her IQ and her EQ more than the mirror: but like i said, she's cute and she if she wanted the haircuts and the facials and if she wore the clothes i bought her she would be more than cute. But, she's, you know... busy.
I'm the only girl in my family, and while occasionally, i've had issues, I know I'm attractive: primarily because I'm interesting. I have no doubt in that. Beauty doesn't really enter the equation (if i thought i was a knock out it might: but while i respect those people, i dont envy them).
When people I'm in relationships with tell me I'm beautiful: i squirm a bit: i think they are telling me that they find the package of me beautiful: which i appreciate: but i don't care if they like the visage: and I feel that statement is a cliche. We find our lovers beautiful because we love them: if they happen to be attractive its a happy accident: but doesn't change the emotion.
By Dove telling us that they are above the issue by making every woman feel beautiful they are actually further ensconcing the issue by even making it one: young boys are not taught to worry about what they look like,they put stress on succeeding in school, sports, or socially; i've never been told by a little boy he wants to handsome.
I'm glad Dove's thinking out of the box...they just have to take a couple more steps out of the beauty aisle.
I guess the weirdness comes in the fact that women saying "i am beautiful" is an embracing of the whole self. But, again, dudes don't say "i am handsome." its perhaps not Dove's fault: but "I love myself" might suffice, and avoid pesky connotations.
I would love to hear if you ladies disagree or agree, or about your own views on beauty.